World Shaken as Joe Biden Picks Karen for VP

world shaken joe biden karen vp
Share on facebook
Facebook
Share on twitter
Twitter
Share on email
Email

Sh*t just got real. Today, the Joe Biden campaign has officially announced their VP pick, and to say the world’s been shaken is an understatement. “I’ve heard so much about this woman,” said Biden, “And I just had to meet her, and let me tell you, boys and girls, she is everything she’s cracked up to be… the next Vice President of the United States…”

And that’s when Karen came out. “It’s gonna be great folks. She’s gonna make a great second-in-command!” Holy. F*cking. Sh*t. The stakes have never been more real than they are today. Just listen to what she said next.

“Thank you, Joe. Thank you, do you mind if I call you Joe?” She pursed her lips together and smiled tightly, “Ok,” she said in a syrupy tone, “Listen, here’s the deal. I notice there are a lot of people out there who don’t seem to think the rules apply to them, who seem to think they’re above the law. What these people have to understand is the rules wouldn’t be the rules if they didn’t apply to you. Yes, I’m talking to you, personally. I see you, and I’m going to make sure you do what’s right and good and best for everyone. Period.” She looked straight into the camera for a pregnant second and said again, emphasizing every syllable, “PER-I-OD.”

The Derringer has exclusive reports from inside the campaign saying that Karen has decided to take over all public performances from Joe while he “gets some much needed rest.”

Share on facebook
Facebook
Share on twitter
Twitter
Share on email
Email

MORE FROM THE DERRINGER

Don't let BIG TECH
keep us apart. Sign up for our newsletter.