Today was a historic day. After years of fighting with tech censors, President Trump took the bold move of declaring his twitter account an AUTONOMOUS ZONE!!! Now that his tweets are their own independent state with its own set of laws that are not a part of Twitter at all, Jack Dorsey and his band of speech police will be unable to take them down.
In a despondent press conference, a Twitter spokesman said the following, “Although we would love to take the tweet down, we have to respect the rights of autonomous zones. Once someone declares an autonomous zone, there’s basically nothing you can do. They’re free.”
Trump followed up his initial tweet with another vowing the protect the new country of Trumptweetastan, “Any attempts to censor or take down any content from this beautiful new country will be met with fire and fury like the world has never seen.” Wow. Inspiring!